Dear Father,
You wrote about how to get a plenary indulgence recently. There was something about being free from any affection for sin. Sometimes when I go to confession, I don’t always feel sorry even though I think I am sorry, if that makes any sense. What if I don’t feel sorry for my sins? Can I still get a plenary indulgence?
-Asher
Dear Asher,
It is possible to be sorry for something sinful but not always feel the sorrow. That’s because human emotions are strange things. We can try to conjure up feelings without success. We can try to get rid of other feelings, again without much success. It’s similar to how we don’t always have feelings of love for someone, but we know that we love that person anyway in spite of our feelings, particularly when the other may not elicit good feelings from us.
Our emotions (our feelings) need to be directed by our intellect (our thinking). Unfortunately, we often get this turned around and let our thinking be directed by our feelings and desires. Proven wisdom tells us that the relationship between our intellect and emotions is like a train. The engine comes first and the other cars follow. Train engineers don’t put the passenger and dining cars at the front of the train. The wrong order will lead to derailment.
So it is with our intellect and our emotions. The intellect is supposed to bring the emotions along. We don’t want the emotions dragging the intellect. When that happens, derailment is imminent. (Which is probably why we have to be in the confessional in the first place.) Ever since the fall of Adam and Eve, humans have struggled to keep their emotions subject to their intellective powers.
When we go to confession, it’s better to pay less attention to our feelings and focus more on our act of sorrow. The very fact of going to confession can be a sign of being sorry for our sins. We express this in our act of contrition, telling God that we are sorry for offending Him and that we resolve to sin no more. That resolution does not depend on our feelings. Then the priest is able to absolve us.
On the other hand, at times people really are not sorry for their sins. One sign of this lack of sorrow is the plan to commit them again. This is not the same as being concerned that one may fall again. The difference is that with true sorrow one does not intend to sin again, for love of God, regardless of how one feels in the moment.
As you mentioned, the plenary indulgence (the full remission of temporal punishment due to sin) requires that we be free from all affection for sin. This means that we are completely detached from all sin, including venial sin. Is this even possible?
Yes, for neither God nor the Church commands the impossible. Repentance with detachment from sin is a grace that God desires to give to every person so that each one can live a fully human and flourishing life. Being completely detached from all sin is how God created us to be.
The saints show us how to be completely detached from all sin. The key is in loving God with all our hearts, minds, souls and strength. It means placing God above everything at all times. It’s how Adam and Eve lived in Eden when they were created, before their rebellion. It’s how the Blessed Mother lived her entire life. It’s how the martyrs showed their love of God over their very existences in the face of cruel tortures and terrifying deaths.
Imagine a man who says to wife: “I love you a lot, but I still hold on to thoughts and desires for my old girlfriend and may meet up with her someday.” Don’t we recognize that he is still attached to his old flame? Don’t we see that he has not given his entire heart to his wife? Don’t we realize that he’s holding out on her?
So, too, with God. You can’t go north and south at the same time, as one of my old theology profs used to say.
For a number of us, learning to be free of all attachment or affection for sin may take time. When we find within our souls that lingering affection for sin, we should gently turn our minds and hearts back to God and to the good.
People sometimes confuse temptations with actual sins or affection for sin. Temptations can wreak havoc on us, but as long we refuse to consent to the sin being suggested we can be sure we have not sinned.
As we practice growing in holiness, which is the same as growing in love for God each day, we will obtain plenary indulgences. Nevertheless, we can avail ourselves of partial indulgences, or the remission of part of our temporal punishment due to sin.
Indulgences, whether full or partial, are meant to be measured by our love of God and all things pertaining to Him.