I am sitting in a clean, organized house, and it is making me uncomfortable.
Not to say that there hasn’t been a rhythm and order to our home over the years, but as more and more of our children begin the transition from living at home, the quiet and order that I once prayed for, or wondered what it would feel like, is being given to me, and I can’t say we are friends yet.
When I was “in the trenches” of parenting, it seemed the kitchen was a revolving door of dishes, the laundry room a mountain of whose clothes are whose, and meals were simple but healthy. Prayer happened because we realized it sustained us, because again, we were in the trenches of raising eight kids under the age of 10.
There is more wiggle room in our family dynamic now, and I am not sure it will serve us as well as I once thought.
How easy it is to say “yes” to more activities because the time is available! We push more worldly things ahead of the sacred and soulful because we think we are giving to our children or our family by these yeses. For so long, we had to say “no.” We just could not do it. We could not afford it, either in money or in time.
Freedom is an interesting concept. We have a God Who is there to guide, Who has laid out a foundation for a happy life, but the choice is ours to make. The paradox that I’m seeing is that when we were the most tired, most spent, most emptied of all we had to give to our family, marriage, church, we were the happiest and the most fulfilled.
Prayer time was paramount because it was necessary. Without it, we could not go on. Our “well” needed to be filled with the grace that comes from that discipline. We gave more, too. We realized that if the church was the center of our family, then that involvement would surround us with a community of people who support one another. We loved helping people move, bringing a family a meal and welcoming in the seminarians and priests for meals. Our home and our hearts were filled.
It is easy to fall into a rut when thinking about stepping into parish life. We sit back and look at our calendar and put our “yes” for parish life in around all our other commitments, but perhaps we need to reverse that process. Faith first. We are going to step into parish life: greeters, youth group, service activities, etc., and all our other commitments will need to fit around this.
We do this with Mass. We will not attend a sports game if it is held before Mass on Sundays. But this is the season! I love a new beginning and am excited about being more intentional. And intentional is the word here.
As my children have grown, and my youngest is now 10 years old, I have more free time. It is easy to fill, but the worldly filling of time doesn’t fill our hearts. We were created to love and to serve. So, in this season of new beginnings, may we stop and ask the Lord where He is guiding our family? What are our gifts now as this new group? How can we serve and be served within parish life, and He will light the way.
I value a family that is a “yes” family. They are not walked upon, but rather are known for making things possible. They serve graciously and without reserve. May we all take time to appreciate where we are in this season and seek to have our identity rooted in our faith community because from there, our well is filled.